I was afraid of my own bathroom. I didn’t want to enter. It was the toilet. The toilet was demonically possessed.
I owned a demonic toilet!!!
It clogged. It clogged a lot. It clogged at the worst possible time. It clogged when guests were coming over. Worse, it clogged when guests were here. And you think hubby would help? Hardly. When the demonic toilet clogged, hubby would look at it, shrug, and say, “Let it sit for a few minutes, then flush it again.” Are you kidding me? Did he think it would unclog itself?
Low flow toilets are supposed to save money and reduce water usage, right? Well, not the demonic toilet. To keep it from clogging, we had to flush at regular intervals.
“Don’t use too much tissue without flushing or the demonic toilet will clog,” I warned everyone. Do you think the kids ever got that message? Hoo boy. You’d think they were trying to see just how much paper they could stuff in the bowl.
The toilet was pure evil!
It sounds silly to claim an inanimate object like a toilet could be evil, but it was. Once I was walking by the bathroom door and I heard evil whisperings and hissing noises coming from the demonic toilet. I told my husband.
He sighed, rolled his eyes, and pulled the top off the tank and said the flapper thingy wasn’t seated and proudly proclaimed it fixed. A few days later, it started hissing again. He bought a new flapper thingy. It hissed louder. He said another thingy was leaking.
I said, “Enough! I’m calling SVM Plumbing, Heating & Air for a potty exorcism.”
Hubby didn’t even argue. I think he was as tired of the demonic toilet as I was.
The plumber that SVM Plumbing, Heating & Air sent to perform a potty exorcism asked whether we wanted to keep fighting the toilet, or simply get rid of it for a newer, better design that actually does it’s job, that actually flushes.
Can I do that, I wondered. It seemed wrong to throw away a perfectly good toilet. Wait-a-sec, I thought. This toilet wasn’t perfectly good. It didn’t work. And it was demon possessed! “Replace it,” I begged.
He did. And life’s been wonderful ever since. No clogs. No hissing. Hubby’s happy. I even threw away the nasty old plunger.
Why don’t you say enough, too?
If your cheap, builder grade low flow toilet is a no flow, why keep fighting it? Get SVM Plumbing, Heating & Air to exorcise your no flow toilet today. Ask our plumber for an estimate or call (530) 842-7862
© 2006 Service Roundtable